Achieving orgasm, brain imaging studies show, involves more than heightened arousal. It requires a release of inhibitions engineered by shutdown of the brain’s center of vigilance..
Yup..fear is not going to help you have great sex or great orgasms.
While many of us can still function in relationship to sex, good sex is a whole other story. There is a reason why so many in the community use drugs and drink in order to depress the inhibitory responses..however in the process there is of an inhibition of aspects of ourselves that are unwanted..for instance..that erection..so many choose to take things like Viagra in order to maintain that function.
There are others that even practice celibacy to maintain self control. They fill their minds with images of how disgusting sex is and work hard to turn themselves off from sex. Most, when asked, do it because they are afraid. Afraid that if they really let go there would be no turning back. They would become some kind of sex fiend. Told early in their lives that sex is a distraction, it is dirty, dangerous and bad for them...they hold onto these ideas despite their body's natural urges. They often sublimate their sexual energies into other activities which is ok..but not actually idea.
In many cases these people have the most difficulty managing appropriate sexual behavior.
These natural urges are an important part of the functioning of a healthy human being.
Healthy sex is not just good for your body it is good for your brain and there are so many other things you can do to reduce your fears and improve your sex life.
1. Learn how to relax and deal with stress. Training your body and mind in relaxation methods on a regular basis improves the feel good chemical ratio in your body while reducing stress.
2. Exercise is another way to help manage stress.
3. Pleasure yourself and let yourself go on a regular basis. Much of the body's responses are conditioned and you can recondition yourself.
4. Erotisize safe sex. It can be very challenging to try to have un inhibited sex while thinking about protection. It is time to make safe sex erotic. Use your imagination....remember, Dr. Ruth said 'Sex happens between the ears!" She was right!
5. There is a difference in body chemistry around elicit sexual behavior and sexual behavior that is sensual. Elicit sexual activity can actually increase stress hormones while sensual and, for lack of a better term, more relaxed sexual behavior increases those feel good chemicals like oxytocin, endorphins, serotonin, and dopamine.
If you are having problems in this area then get help. There is no reason to suffer about sex. At my office we have helped hundreds of people struggling to have a fun and rewarding sex life!
www.bestlifehypnosis.com
Go have sex!!!!!
